Reposted; original from February 7th, 2010:

Here's a recipe I've been meaning to share for years and years, but food blogging sort of died down when I got my Android phone, which, among other great hardware failings, has an absolutely crap camera---so bad it might actually make iPhone owners smirk. And food blogging without a decent photo of the dish just feels wrong. Today, therefore, having a batch of vindaloo left over from yesterday along with an unaccustomed feeling of industriousness, I dug out my old Nokia E90, which, while probably still blasphemy to any serious photographer, still has the best damned camera I've ever owned. Food photography settled; food blogging can now resume.

This dish started out with a recipe for chicken vindaloo I found online in the dark prehistory of the internets---the site, while indisputably precious even today with its sentiment of capsaicin assisted suicide, is so old I might well have found my way to it through Altavista. I've had more than ten years to refine the recipe (to make it properly vegetarian, especially), and here's the result: my all time favourite dish, bar none.

As always, the usual caveat applies: consult the Scoville scale and maintain proper respect for habañeros at all times. Use less potent chilies if you're not used to them; in fact, the curry paste might very well contain more than enough capsaicin for the inexperienced palate: dispense with the chilies altogether if so.

British Army Vindaloo

250-500 g tofu
1 large onion, chopped
1 can chick peas
1 can chopped tomatoes
10-15 cherry tomatoes
2-4 habañeros
1 bulb garlic
1 fair sized lump of ginger (about 2x the amount of garlic)
1 fair sized bunch of fresh coriander
1/2 glass Patak's vindaloo paste or similar (Extra Hot is even better, depending on mood)
2 tbsp tomato purée
2 tbsp mango chutney
1-2 dl vinegar (approx, to taste)
1 tbsp whole cumin seeds
1 tbsp garam masala
1 tsp ground black pepper
1 tbsp vegetable ghee or cooking oil

Dice the tofu into 1-2cm³ pieces and deep fry at 170ºC for 1 minute or fry in a frying pan for 1-2 minutes on each side. The surface of the tofu should turn golden, but not brown. Set aside.

Blend the habañeros, garlic and ginger using a hand mixer or blender. Add one cherry tomato if you like to make it easier to blend. Set aside.

Heat the frying pan to medium heat and melt the ghee. When the pan is hot enough, sprinkle the cumin seeds into the ghee. They should sizzle, but not burn. After about 30 seconds, add the chopped onion and sauté until it softens slightly.

Add the chili/garlic/ginger paste, stir well while allowing it to fry for about a minute. Add the vindaloo paste and tomato purée. Stir it all together while frying for another minute or so.

Add the can of chopped tomatoes, liquid and all. Stir well until everything blends and it starts to look curry coloured. Stir in the mango chutney, black pepper and vinegar. The vinegar is what makes the vindaloo: blend and taste until you find the amount that suits you best.

Add the tofu and chick peas. Chop the coriander well and stir it in. Leave to boil gently for 10 to 45 minutes---more is better because the tofu will absorb more flavour, but not necessary if you're feeling impatient. I'll usually start boiling the rice at the same time I start preparing the curry, and leave it boiling until the rice is done, maybe 15-20 minutes, with fairly good results.

When you feel like it's boiled long enough, stir in the garam masala and add the cherry tomatoes. Leave to cook for another 3-5 minutes before serving, allowing the tomatoes to heat through.

Serve with rice, maybe a splash of chutney on the side. Pappadums are near essential accessories, and a good raita is advised if you're serving guests who aren't used to the habañeros.

Many variations are available: as well as tofu and chick peas, the dish works splendidly with mushrooms, spring onions, potatoes, lentils and even aubergines. If you're willing to pollute your body with animal flesh, chicken obviously works magnificently. Feel free to experiment: the only spectacular failure I've had with this recipe is when something (presumably the Devil) possessed me to try it with fried salmon.

Reposted; original from December 17th, 2008:

For some reason, this is my most popular recipe. Possibly, this is simply because I know too many World of Warcraft players.

Yes, I used to be one. I got into the US open beta by fabricating a zip code (90210, how hard is that?) , and was a hardcore 18-hours-a-day addict through three betas and a few weeks into the EU release. And that, fortunately, was the extent of my life-swallowing WoW addiction. I've stuck with the culture of the game, though, and my favourite part is when people try to recreate in-game cooking recipes, like the real-life Westfall Stew recipe.

My version is vegetarian, and thus obviates the hours of pointless grinding the original requires. Apart from that, it's relatively faithful to the original recipe, which is based on a reasonably typical Mexican chili. In fact, without the Murloc eyes, this is more properly Mexican food than WoW food.

(And for the record, yes, of course I played Horde. On a PvP server. I spent fifteen levels in Stranglethorn Vale. On a PvP server. I'm not usually prejudiced, but after that, you'll excuse me for thinking all Alliance players are human filth. Or night elf filth. Especially night elf filth.)

Vegetarian Westfall Stew

250-500 g tofu
4 soy sausages
2 small onions
2 bell peppers
2-3 champignons or similar mushrooms
2 cloves garlic
3 habañeros
2 cans chopped tomatoes
1 box of pre-made salsa (preferably containing tequila)
1 can chickpeas
1 can red beans
1 small can maize
10 cherry tomatoes (approx)
1 tsp whole cumin
1 tsp basil
1/2 tsp oregano
1/2 tsp ground black pepper
1 tsp sugar
1 tsp unsweetened cocoa powder

Start by dicing the tofu into 1-2cm³ pieces and frying them in a frying pan for one minute on each side, until the surface is crunchy, but not too crunchy. Set the tofu aside.

Put the garlic and the habañeros in a blender and mince into a fine paste. Don't worry too much about the amount of habañeros---it's going to be a large dish. On the other hand, don't stick your nose into the blender and inhale, or anything equally silly. Remember, capsaicin is not a joke.

Chop the onions, mushrooms and bell peppers, and slice the soy sausages into 1cm slices.

Find a really large cooking pot. The dish can easily occupy three or four litres, so be prepared. Heat a decent amount of cooking oil, and when it's ready, add the cumin and let it sizzle for a few seconds. Be careful, don't let it burn.

Next, add the garlic/habañero paste, stir well, and let it fry for another few seconds. Add the onions, and sauté until they soften. Add the bell peppers and mushrooms, and sauté for about three minutes.

Pour in the canned tomatoes and salsa. There should be a fair amount of liquid in there now. Add the basil, oregano, black pepper, sugar and cocoa powder. Stir well, and taste. If the taste is a bit weak, or the sauce too thin, you can try adding a teaspoon or two of chili powder.

Add the tofu, beans and chickpeas, give it a good stir, and leave it to boil at medium heat for about ten minutes.

Add the maize and cherry tomatoes, stir, and leave it for a minute or two.

Congratulations, you are done. Serve with rice.